On the dawn of another Father’s Day, after scrambling around with the kids to buy gifts, make cards and plan meals, it occurs to me that more important than any of this is the true and sincere appreciation of my husband, my kids’ father.
There’s an incredible amount of conversation and hype around moms and what we do for our spouses, kids and families, while also managing the household, volunteering for the school, trying to stay in great shape, be healthy and look good, and for many of us, working full-time. And, I can tell you with great certainty that like most moms, I, too, run myself ragged on a number of occasions trying to be all things to all people in order to fulfill my own crazy notion of what it means to be a ‘super mom’ and ‘super wife.’
But here’s the rub. My husband does at least as much for the well-being of our family as I do, if not more. While I’m running around like a crazy person, he’s not sitting on his bum all day. In fact, he not only tackles all of the dad roles we’ve implicitly agreed upon, he manages the day-to-day operations of our business and runs himself ragged trying to take care of me, too. And, if I’m honest, he does all this with a lot less noise, hype and emotion than I project on a regular basis.
So when did it become politically correct to pay so much attention to how women’s roles have changed and how we cope with that in today’s society, with seemingly less conversation about how it’s affecting our children’s dads?
I’m not saying that there isn’t a lot of appreciation out there for the dads in the world because there is. I’m just suggesting that in my corner of the world anyway, I’m not sure I express it enough.
Yes, I’m sure I take on 47 more roles than our moms likely ever had to do and it’s the same for all my friends. But you know what? My husband works a lot of hours, too and he still makes breakfast and dinner, packs the school lunches, coaches the sports teams, pays the bills, does the grocery shopping, walks the dog and somehow in the middle of it all, finds a way to make the world stop when I walk in the room so he can take care of me.
He graciously listens to my “coaching” and advice, politely accepts my micro-managing due to my crazy mom fears, he drops everything when I am sad or upset and he’s just present in a way that I deeply admire and aspire someday to be.
Like me, he’s not perfect, but he’s a good man—a thoughtful, heartfelt, nice person who strives to positively affect others’ lives, and grow and contribute every day.
I am extraordinarily grateful for all the dads out there and the vital role you play in the lives of our children and in our families—whatever your particular family dynamic happens to be.
And to my husband, Chris, you are my everything. Happy Father’s Day, honey. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all you do and are for our beautiful boys. They are better people because of you, as am I. I love you infinitely.
Happy Father’s Day, everyone!
P.S. Apparently, the New York Times agrees with me, too: http://nyti.ms/mk90bS